The Secret of Success
The Crucial Component to Effectiveness that Many Ignore
The voice was friendly on the telephone. "I've been appointed to look into the issue as you've written complaining about our charges," he said. "I am looking into them, but your deadline is today and my report is not yet complete."
It was my bank in the UK Channel Islands. His call was unanticipated, although I'd been waiting to see their reply for a surprisingly long time.
The bank's charges had been amazingly high, so several month earlier I had written to ask why. They'd ignored my letter, nor did they respond to my second. So in my next I threatened to escalate my complaint to their Chairman if I did not hear back from them. Finally, they were responding.
"Doing a good job will need a number of hours, I would have to stay rather late and it's now Friday lunchtime. But I've planned to get away promptly for the weekend," he continued, "May I leave completing it to next week?"
It was my bank in the UK Channel Islands. His call was unanticipated, although I'd been waiting to see their reply for a surprisingly long time.
The bank's charges had been amazingly high, so several month earlier I had written to ask why. They'd ignored my letter, nor did they respond to my second. So in my next I threatened to escalate my complaint to their Chairman if I did not hear back from them. Finally, they were responding.
"Doing a good job will need a number of hours, I would have to stay rather late and it's now Friday lunchtime. But I've planned to get away promptly for the weekend," he continued, "May I leave completing it to next week?"
So I made the mistake of saying no and denying his request! He then had to stay late at work that Friday afternoon to investigate the matter. By not agreeing to his extremely reasonable request, I'd spoilt his weekend away to his cottage with his wife and children.
His report arrived promptly the following week. He knew I'd be pleased to see that he'd completed his investigation on time before my deadline expired. But he'd also found that the fees the bank had charged me to be perfectly reasonable, given the circumstances they had not overcharged me in the slightest!
How Come?
Recalling this incident, I am very embarrassed at how I'd ignored his request. I was totally blind to the repercussions of refusing his request and upsetting his weekend plans away with his family.
The outcome of his investigation was dramatically affected by his circumstances. I'm pretty certain that he'd have been far more sympathetic if I had been more aware of his context. But back then, many years ago, I didn't realize that the secret of success does not lie in being right.
His decision cost me a fairly sizable amount of money. But who was responsible? Was it the fault of the bank - or even his fault? No, although my self-sabotage mechanism did initially say this. I had spoilt his plans for the weekend, which meant that he would investigate my complaint about their outrageously high fees with a negative mind-set.
"It is not so much what you do that makes you rich or poor. It is more the context surrounding what you do
that makes you rich or poor.
"That is why when people ask me what I do ... I reply; 'Please don't ask me what I do.
Ask me what I think about what I do.'
"The difference ... is the context surrounding the actions or content."
"Whether you think you can, or you cannot, you're right - either way!"
Enjoy more Aha moments
There are many secrets of success shared in these pages, each one will change your context instead of simply what you know. So now you have the Life Strategies secret of success, we don't aim to teach, we educate. Educare is the Latin root of education - to draw forth from within.
Each change in your context brings you another aha moment. A discussion of perspective often leaves you seeing things differently, and you find yourself able to say something along these lines:
I probably wouldn't have said it quite that way,
yet I can see this does make enormous sense.
Do you Believe in Believing?
When your hand holds a glass full of juice, you don't say I believe this is a glass full of juice, instead you say with certainty I know. You may add that you believe it's orange juice, but only when you aren't absolutely certain that it is orange juice. This secret of success is to realize you only use the word believe because you do not know!
Do you hold any unquestioned beliefs? Many people spend their lives imagining they need things to be happy. A fulfilling job, control over something or someone, money, power, love, friends, wealth, to work for yourself, approval of other people, whatever … Which do you believe?
Life generally doesn't bring you what you imagine you need to be happy. You spend your time worrying about the future in an always different world which doesn't quietly submit to you being in control. And then you doom yourself to a frustrating life of insecurity and anxiety. The secret of success is to realize the certainty of authentic knowing is a far better way...
How do you become certain? Not by being gullible or believing what you hear, but by investigating for yourself. Belief can't get you there, you need to be skeptical. As a skeptic, you withhold judgment to start with until you have investigated the truth for yourself. You neither believe nor disbelieve, because you just don't know yet.
You need to invest in yourself. Once you've learned how to check things out and arrive at knowing the truth, you can be more certain. But not until you've personally put in the required time and energy.
Food for Thought
"No man has a chance to enjoy permanent success until he begins
to look in a mirror for the real cause of all his mistakes."
Napoleon Hill, American author, success guru, attorney, lecturer, 1883-1970,
advisor to President Franklin D. Roosevelt
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